Second Podcast
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[00:00:00] Isn't it true that if you don't use it, you lose it? So why am I keeping everything in my calendar? Shouldn't I be trying to remember it? Welcome to the Nerdy Organizer Podcast. I'm your host, Kimberly Dawn Wells, certified time management coach, and today I am answering an at least 15-year-old question that I was once asked by a client.
[00:00:21] I didn't have a terribly great, sophisticated answer for it at the time, but I am well prepared today. And I would hope so, right. With 15 years to think about it, and I seriously have been thinking about this for the last 15 years. It comes up often in my brain. Let me set the scene of the original situation.
[00:00:39] I had a training set up for some friends and acquaintances, a small group, maybe half a dozen people showed up. I had handouts, I had post-it notes. I had hula hoops because I am a professional, and we started by making lists of things we had to do one on each note. And then we put the hula hoops on the floor and we sorted the to-dos into three big categories.
[00:01:01] We had tasks, just little one-offs, things we had to do. We had projects bigger, more complex collections of tasks, and we had events, things that we would normally think to put on our calendars, appointments, meetings, et cetera. There we are putting post-it notes on the floor in hula hoops, and one person asked, but isn't it true that if you don't use it, you lose it?
[00:01:23] So shouldn't I be working harder to remember this stuff rather than write it down? My whole goal of this workshop was to teach people how to put everything in their calendar, including their tasks and their projects, how to literally assign a time and a duration for everything they plan to do, rather than just running on vibes and hoping they'll find the time and the motivation to tackle these items.
[00:01:45] And now this person comes along with a question that kills my momentum and it throws off my groove. And I have to admit, it's a good question. It makes sense. We say things like, if you don't use it, you'll lose it. [00:02:00] So how does not using your brain in this sense relate to that quote? How does it all fit together, and why would I be convincing you to not use your brain?
[00:02:10] So at the time, I think I stumbled my way through an explanation about forgetting things and how there's a difference between using your brain to manage your life and the risk of forgetting to buy milk. And it was all not wrong, but it was not sophisticated. And now that I've had a little time to think about this, I have a better response.
[00:02:28] And it's still actually pretty much the same response, but with more nuance and a more solid understanding of the background. I know why this person asked that question. Aside from it just being a catchphrase, it felt like a trend in brain training in order to prevent dementia and Alzheimer's was hitting critical math.
[00:02:46] In 2002, a large scale study was published in jama, the Journal of the American Medical Association, and it was called the Advanced Cognitive Training for Independent and Vital Elderly or Active Study. It was a longitudinal study, so it followed a set of participants over time and they put out follow-up results over the next 10 years.
[00:03:06] The study showed that for specific types of training, there were immediate and statistically significant improvements. In cognition and that the long-term effects over five and 10 years remained at levels that were both statistically and practically significant. The type of training tested did result in an improved everyday cognitive function.
[00:03:32] Now, this is important because it is one thing to do a study or to have a theory about something, and it's another to be able to generate the type and the volume of results. That the scientific community agrees are legitimate cause and effect results. So the results of this study, for those of us, especially with cognitive disease in our family histories, this was pretty exciting and parallel to this specific study.
[00:03:55] There were other businesses and universities and individuals doing their [00:04:00] own research, creating their own conclusions. And between 2005 and 2008, we saw this explosion of. Brain training games and resources everywhere. Nintendo's brain age, luminosity, fit brains, Sudoku came back. Brain training became this cultural phenomenon.
[00:04:19] So this is all to say that at the time brain training is on our brains. And the basis of many of these games and techniques is memorization. Memorizing a list, holding that list in your memory over time. Can you come back tomorrow and remember that list? So here I am telling you don't rely on memorization.
[00:04:38] Don't rely on your memory with all this pop culture and media noise saying, memory, memory, memory. So I said then, and I stand by my advice. Do not rely on your brain to remember these things. Get them out of your brain. Get them down on paper or digital, and get them hard scheduled. Give them a time and a duration in which to live and to be processed.
[00:05:01] List. So why do I stand behind this advice? One summary of reason. It's the right question, but it's about the wrong thing. If I tell you that if you attempt to memorize your shopping list, there is a risk and there are consequences, like you might forget the milk. That sounds trite. It doesn't sound like a big deal.
[00:05:23] It's one thing, one component of an entire day. So I forgot to buy milk. What is the big deal? But when you step back and you look at your day and your week and your month, you know for a fact that it isn't actually just about the fact that you forgot to buy the milk the one time because you know that it is about, you forgot to buy the milk at the store, and then on the way home you forgot to do the other thing.
[00:05:50] And then when you got home that night, you ran out of time to do another thing and then you forgot about the deadline on Friday, and then you just never got around to scheduling the vacation and suddenly the summer [00:06:00] is over. And it goes on and it goes on and it compounds over time. No one comes to me as a time management coach because they forgot to buy milk.
[00:06:11] They come to me because they forgot to buy the milk. They forgot to return the library books. They forgot the appointment on Friday. They forgot the other thing. They never went on vacation. And over time, now they've created this life where they have come to not know themselves as a person who is effective and efficient in their own lives.
[00:06:29] They don't know themselves as a person who's getting things done the way that they want to, and when they said they would do it, and they don't know themselves as a person who's living the life that they want to live. If you want to practice memorizing your shopping list, by all means, go for it. If you want to try each morning to remember what you had planned for the day, that is great.
[00:06:50] And also have these things written down. Do them as a fun little trick, but do not rely on your memory as the singular place to hold this information. It may feel fun and creative, but when you operate your entire life, the basis of your life from this place, all you are doing is generating chaos. All you are doing is allowing and perpetuating, disorganization, and a lack of integrity in your life.
[00:07:14] When you plan to do something and you end up not doing it, when you make a promise and you end up not fulfilling it, you don't build a great life. You don't build a foundation for bigger things, for more responsibility, for greater achievement. And you end up eroding your integrity and your trust with other people.
[00:07:30] These are not the types of places in your life that should be a playground for experimenting with memory and brain training games. These are the things in your life that have real consequences. So these are the areas in your life you should be mastering, mastering, managing, moving on instead through my philosophy of paying yourself first, when you make time for the things in life that you love, your hobbies, your travel.
[00:07:55] Free time, social engagement, movement, music, sensory [00:08:00] activities, use those opportunities to keep your brain sharp. We have reduced the spectrum of our lives to work and play, and the problem isn't having boundaries around work. It's that play has become too small and too narrow and too neglected of a part of our lives, and it's that we think that rest and play are rewards for the work rather than the bulk of what our lives could include.
[00:08:23] And it's that we think that rest in play must be in service to work, otherwise we are lazy and unmotivated. So on the one hand, you have this lifestyle that people think is appropriate and necessary where they race around all day, disorganized, trying to keep stuff in their brain, trying to get things done, dropping balls constantly left and right, and they don't have the time or the energy to participate in rest and hobbies and free time.
[00:08:49] They aren't sleeping well, they aren't eating well, and it is mind boggling to me how white their knuckles will get as they hold so firmly to this idea that this is what is necessary in order for them to get through life, that this is the way of it. My wish for you is for you to have a life where you are very organized, where your information is streamlined and accessible, where you are accurately meeting your appointments and your deadline.
[00:09:18] And running an efficient household and that is in service to your rest and your free time, are abundant and filled with valuable life, enriching projects that you love, that challenge you, that restore you, that fill you with energy. I want you to have hobbies and experiences that build upon your life literally and figuratively.
[00:09:36] As much as I do love spreadsheets, I would so much rather practice brain training and use it or lose it with pickleball and pottery and hiking. And one way of getting there is to be in the habit of writing things down because as David Allen said in his book, getting Things Done, your Mind is for having ideas not holding them.[00:10:00]
[00:10:00] That's what I have for you today, an answer to a very good 15-year-old question that I still stand behind today. If you two are interested in more about the results of the active study, keep an eye on the show notes and I'll add some links in the future. I'm Kimberly Dawn Wells. Thanks so much for listening to another episode of The Nerdy Organizer Podcast and tune in for so much more coming soon.